aftermath
July 4th 2007 16:14
Prosey poem thingy..
'Madness, takes it's toll'
~Time Warp, The Rocky Horror Show
I am listening to the receptionist laugh on the phone while i wait for Sheila.
Sheila seems nervous around me. I have no idea why.
Thoughts
turn to feelings
which turn to behaviour
Shiela shows me
a triangle with arrows
on a whiteboard
l thought to myself
are you implying
that i have control
over my thoughts
sure enough the conversation
turns to mind drugs
zombie drugs, i reel off
the list, i reel off the same
boring story i told the others
i turn up the heat and tell her
i won't take them, so don't bother
going down that road
my teeth grind and my pride
is in my throat
Shiela wants to delve more
i tell her i'm not interested
i'm been psycho analyzed
to death, and tell her my little parties
with the mental delvers
has done more harm than good
'how's that working for you
managing on our own?'
Shiela smiles as she throws
her cliche gauntlet down
i glare at her and tell her
it works fine thank you
(i've learnt how to build walls quickly
for the ignorant)
she brushes my retort off
as 'denial behaviour'
Sheila tells me the good news
'we can pay your telephone bill'
but this is the last time' she scolds
'you've been here 4 times
DHS, you know'
i tell her, 'yeah i know'
and fall silent
'thank fuck for that'
is jumping in my head
i felt belittled when she
showed me that diagram
and then secretly went home
and fixated on my next magic recipe
'must control thoughts' etc
when the panic monster
has belted me around
i have this wonderful
enlightening moment
where i realize that
i am safe, once more
and i look behind me
at the trail of destruction
and see that you have
moved further away from me
can i just turn up at the mental clinic now
and be done with it?
at least i'll get some meals, no mail
and surely they have art classes
edge living; nothing like it.....
~Lily
'Madness, takes it's toll'
~Time Warp, The Rocky Horror Show
I am listening to the receptionist laugh on the phone while i wait for Sheila.
Sheila seems nervous around me. I have no idea why.
Thoughts
turn to feelings
which turn to behaviour
Shiela shows me
a triangle with arrows
on a whiteboard
l thought to myself
are you implying
that i have control
over my thoughts
sure enough the conversation
turns to mind drugs
zombie drugs, i reel off
the list, i reel off the same
boring story i told the others
i turn up the heat and tell her
i won't take them, so don't bother
going down that road
my teeth grind and my pride
is in my throat
Shiela wants to delve more
i tell her i'm not interested
i'm been psycho analyzed
to death, and tell her my little parties
with the mental delvers
has done more harm than good
'how's that working for you
managing on our own?'
Shiela smiles as she throws
her cliche gauntlet down
i glare at her and tell her
it works fine thank you
(i've learnt how to build walls quickly
for the ignorant)
she brushes my retort off
as 'denial behaviour'
Sheila tells me the good news
'we can pay your telephone bill'
but this is the last time' she scolds
'you've been here 4 times
DHS, you know'
i tell her, 'yeah i know'
and fall silent
'thank fuck for that'
is jumping in my head
i felt belittled when she
showed me that diagram
and then secretly went home
and fixated on my next magic recipe
'must control thoughts' etc
when the panic monster
has belted me around
i have this wonderful
enlightening moment
where i realize that
i am safe, once more
and i look behind me
at the trail of destruction
and see that you have
moved further away from me
can i just turn up at the mental clinic now
and be done with it?
at least i'll get some meals, no mail
and surely they have art classes
edge living; nothing like it.....
~Lily
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Comment by David
I like the opening:
And I really like these lines:
has belted me around
David ...
Comment by Lily
Ars Poetica
~Lily
Comment by Always Eighteen
Always Eighteen
I love this style of writing.
And I love the word "aftermath" for some reason. What's your favourite poem at the moment? I'd love to read it.
Comment by Lily
Ars Poetica
I read a lot of poems, and have a lot of favourites, but i was recently introduced to Rudyard Kipling's, 'IF'. I think it's wonderful and i've read it many times. I'll put it up on my blog (link below). Do you have a favourite poem AE?
IF
Comment by Always Eighteen
Always Eighteen
I currently like "silence" by bradley hathaway. He's a terrific performer. When I saw him pop out of a concert one day and recite a poem, it finally hit me that poetry truly was amazing. I really want to get more into it.
I'll read IF now
Comment by Lily
Ars Poetica
So now my next question is; do you write poetry? or have you? I have a feeling you could lay down some great lines.
~Lily
Comment by Wendi
I like the same lines David selected, particularly the bit about the gauntlet. But for some reason I can't yet rationalize in my own head, the following bit really grabbed me and is maintaining its grip:
has belted me around
i have this wonderful
enlightening moment
where i realize that
i am safe, once more
and i look behind me
at the trail of destruction
and see that you have
moved further away from me
I love this kind of writing... and you're so damned good at it!!!
W
Comment by Lily
Ars Poetica
the heart of the poem, thanks for 'seeing' it..
~Lily